JuJu Chang from 'Nightline' thanked me for my transparency while filming. I saw this as a very unique quality and inspired my blog, "Transparent Thoughts NYC." Thanks JuJu!
Over a year ago I met Susan Rose and Jennifer Heller through a client. They run an elite matchmaking service (called Rose and Heller Inc. Matchmaking Service). It's very pricey and they claim (as most matchmakers do) to know what type of man you need and what you should be doing to attract him.
At this point in my life, I was very excited about the opportunity to get on television (especially a program like 'Nightline') and portray my personality while showing off my skills as an "expert dater." I was offered a deal of a lifetime to sign up with this service and I was delighted to have the opportunity to not only be on TV but to work with women in the matchmaking business who are the experts on men and dating.
If they had approached me today, I never would have accepted this offer. I have made so many personal strides that I can truly say, without a doubt, that I am not the same person. When I look back at the segment, I see a woman who was a compulsive dater, a people pleaser and actually a little sad. I felt that if I didn't have a date lined up for the week, that I would fail to find a partner. I believed the matchmakers when they told me I needed to "tone down" (in character and style) to make myself more attractive to potential bachelors. Matchmakers will sometimes find a weakness and play on that insecurity to get you to settle for someone who may not be right for you.
To top it off, when you're not in touch with your inner-strength, sadness and confusion as to who you are and who you should be comes forth in everything you do and say. In fact, right after I completed the six weeks of filming, my right eye actually began to twitch because I became so nervous and neurotic! This was a turning point for me in my personal life. I realized I really did need to "chill" and get back in touch with who I was as a person and what I had to offer to not only potential mates but to the important people who surround me in my life on a daily basis. Creating a strong foundation within yourself and being your own best friend and cheerleader makes a big difference in how you identify with people and the world around you.
I wouldn't be the same today had I not driven myself completely nuts and had not met these two "fabulous" women. These matchmakers believed in changing me first to meet the right guy. Their "skillful" approach was demeaning. I never needed to change. I have always been fun, dynamic and attractive with a terrific sense of style and grace. I just had to grow up and give myself a little more credit!