Saturday, October 16, 2010

When dating becomes a chore.....(Dedicating this particular blog to the beautiful women last night who never give up and are good to one another :))

  Hanging out with my girlfriends, we began to remiss about the days when dates used to be so exciting and the thrill of meeting someone new or even the challenge of getting a man felt like a high.  However, in the dating world "luck" comes into play and you just have to be fortunate where that natural connection is there and both parties want the same "thing" at the same "time."  There are some people that remain on the dating circuit for years and this is when the fun ends and the job begins. 
  A while back, I went on a blind date.  I got there and immediately the physical attraction was not there.  However, some things take time and giving it a chance is the best way to go.  It's not all "looks", right?  I got to the date and had one drink.  After an hour had passed, I said to my date, " well, the connection isn't here for me but I'm glad we gave this a try." He was not pleased (rather pissed actually :)) and replied "I'm having a good time over here, who's going to pay for all these drinks?"  It was two drinks and I marched right up to the bar and paid for both our drinks.  He of course ran after me to pay for his portion but it was too late and I was hailing a cab.
   Some women might not agree with my blatantly, honest approach and sit there with a guy she is not interested in  for the rest of the night. Some even go as far as telling the guy to call her at the end of the night when she knows that call will never be returned.  This particular date is an example of the "chore date."
   How is this dilemma fixed?  Going on date after date can feel like an interview process and taking a break and getting your head out of that mindset is a must! Telling your whole life story is beyond exhausting and who could blame you for feeling wiped out, "Yes, I'm as comfortable in a skirt as I am in sweats.  Yes, I went to college.  Yes, I'm a happy person and yes, I have a job.  No, I'll never gain a pound."  Another angle, is going out with your friends either before or after you meet up with a guy because at least the entire evening was not dedicated to the date (which might actually improve your frame of mind!).  More importantly, always keep your chin up because "well" as one of my girlfriends always puts it " at least you tried."

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